Cranky

I am just cranky feeling deep inside. I hate that. I try to stay away from people when I feel like this because I just don't like the negative vibes I'm putting off and I'm sure no one else does. So on this sunny beautiful morning, which is too icy to ride except the boring flat route around my little town, I have been comtemplating why I'm feeling this way. Maybe if I get it out I will feel better.

It started Thursday afternoon. I was supposed to get off work at 3:30. I work a "flex" schedule which means I work extented hours during most days and every other week it works out to getting off at 3:30 on Thursdays and every other Friday off. My phone rang about 3:15, I answered it. It was a client, VERY drunk. He's homeless and has other issues besides being a drunk and homeless but generally friendly and young. A guy he was hanging/drinking with ripped off all of his food for the month, so he's looking at 12 days with no food. Only thing I can do is refer him to food banks, but they are streached pretty thin right now and there is a real possibility of turning him away because he's soo drunk. Then he tells me in graphic detail about how he is going to stick a knife in the throat of the guy who took his food. OK, so now we are on a different level of discussion. Then he starts going on about killing himself. Aww shit. He has a few ways of doing it, from walking out onto a busy road and getting splattered to the knife. I tell him I'm going to have him talk to a friend of mine, in reality the head of the office. I write a note that said exactly "client very drunk, talking about hurting other's and himself" flag down a co-working walking past my office to take to the supervisor. I'm thinking they will call the cops to pick him up until he sobers up, that way he will at least have a warm place and food for a day or so, or they would hospitalize him for 72 hrs in the psych ward to get him through this crisis. Anyway, I finally am able to switch his call to the supervisor after getting him to promise me he will not hang up and will talk with her. Then I try to breath again. I'm a calm person, can't remember the last time I outwardly became freaked (on the inside is a different story). I walk down past the supervisor's office and she's talking quite loudly and forcefully. I hung out until the call was finished and the supervisor came to me telling me she told him to call the local mental health agency, etc etc. Turns out she got the wrong information as it trickled down and she thought he was threatening to kill ME!!! Ohhh, not good. I hope he did. I would have called the cops at least for a welfare check but we have "procedures" to follow. The guy was desperate, needed help, reached out. Well, when it comes down to it, it's all out of my hands, I'm powerless.

Took my son to the orthopeadic dr on Friday. He is "loose-jointed" which is a genetic thing, like baby's and toddlers who are very flexible and then tighten up as they grow older. He is still "loose" which is causing the kneecap dislocation. The more it dislocates, the more things loosen up = bad! So he is in a full leg brace. the idea is to totally immobilize his leg for 1 month so things can basically atrophy and shrink up, like when someone becomes paralyzed the everything shrinks and draws in. So hockey is out. That really is a bummer, this is his 1st year, he really enjoys it and has been steadly improving. His team was to head up north to Fairbanks for the State Tournement and now he is out. AHHHHGGGGGG! I talked to the coach, they will still let him go and dress out and sit the bench. I asked the doctor if this could wait until after the tourny in mid-march, dr said no or there is chance of real damage which requires really nasty surgery and this type of surgery on a growning 14 yr old boy would really be bad and probably would need follow up surgeries as he grows. OK, got that message loud and clear. Besides, my son says he's not skating well because he is afraid of hurting his knee. It's pretty awful when it dislocates and the more it comes out, the easier it is to come out. My nephew commented that he's notices my son is holding back also.
So my son is a peg-leg and trying to get out of his chores - :). He tried to clean up his bike yesterday but got frustrated at not being able to crouch down so I took over. He was just smearing around the gunk anyway. He way over-lub'd everything so it was all really dirty and gunky. I got it almost shiny looking and gave a nice lub and grease job, as much as I know how to do anyway. I keep telling him that sometimes less is more but he really needed to basically strip it all and start over. Shifts way better now. I sure could use a work stand, I had the bike upside down, trying to shift it with my toes, balance it against my head (took the seat post out to drain any water that got in there) and other contortions. All of this in 5 degree windchill. BRRR! Sometimes I wish I could chuck the 9 to 5 and become a bike wrench!! I have BIG dreams!!!!!!! HA

Ok, I feel a little better. I'm done :)